I raised my children with one philosophy. …”Be the Wolf”. A few years back my daughter made me realize she had always thought it meant “don’t be a sheep”( i.e. following the crowd ) and i had to explain that wasn’t it…. entirely.
The phrase encompasses many things but basically i describe it as follows:
First of all, don’t be one of the sheep. Just because all your friends are doing, saying, wearing or buying something- it doesn’t mean it’s right for you, or the best thing. By not choosing the same things , it doesn’t make you weird or abnormal. It makes you an independent thinker and someone with your own mind. You don’t need someone else to tell you how to think or behave. That’s why God gave you a separate brain and body. We had no Tv most of the time, did not read the newspaper or listen to the news, we did not go to neighborhood (or even very many family parties) or belong to any “clubs”. We did things without the influence of the Zombie like world around us.
Second, Don’t try to be the shepherd. Leaders are often put in the position of having to please the crowd. They take on the heavy responsibility of wearing that crown and often become corrupted in the process. Becoming popular is a heady experience ..but with all that power , it’s tempting to become egotistical and self-serving. Make choices in your own life, and help others when they need it. But don’t become a slave to position.
Third-Be the wolf. Life is about survival. As in most things, once you have obtained your basic needs it’s time to get out . You don’t need to hang out waiting for something bigger or better to come along. Leave something for others. Because it’s not always about your own needs- sometimes you have to feed the pack too. There’s a time for both. Develop a strong sense of choosing which is best option.Sometimes, it’s get in, get want you need, and get out.And live life on your OWN terms.
Overall, my children have turned out to be wonderful, caring and discerning humans. They have chosen friends wisely and not fallen into group think. They are unselfish in ways I rarely see in their generation as a whole. They have made it to adulthood without addictions, criminal records or other destructive life choices. They have excellent careers, remain close as a family and still show an amazing amount of compassion and concern for others. I am one proud Mamma.
Best of all, they have both told me i was a good mom. Not perfect , but good. We are loners as well as a pack, we have survived and we remain close. And that’s just about all a Lone Wolf can want in life:)