But we are FREE…Aren’t we?

Sometimes days or weeks can go by and i do not have a single thing to write about. But this isn’t one of them.

The problem is, there is so much to say, i cannot begin to put together the thoughts into words that would have any power or meaning behind them to effectively project the intensity . And it’s because of that intensity, i have almost become numb.What else is there to say anyway?

I am watching the world around me go completely crazy, and watch some of my previous thoughts and statements become almost prophecies fulfilled. I have both conquered and i have failed. But we are free, at least, aren’t we?

As a non participator in politics, i watch as the various groups continue to bark orders, make demands, incite violence and vie for position in the ring. I watch family members changing into brainwashed drones, even taking classes to learn how to keep their civil “liberties”. I watch friends i’ve known since high school becoming people of middle earth- the Ringwraiths, Orcs, and Balrogs. And i watch those scorned for being ‘different’ fight and rise, then disappear again from sheer exhaustion. I am not sure who i am among them.

In a world wallowing in the anxiety of a pandemic, i struggle to find my own way. There is no need to reach out when i am drowning, because others are also drowning and cannot help..So i keep swimming, always in a rip tide, my head bobbing up for air when i get a lucky break.

With a mindset that seems very different from the rest, i make my art, pay my bills, set goals, and navigate obstacles breath by breath. I no longer defend my positions or actions.No one hears or notices or cares. I just do them. But, we are free , aren’t we?

Governed by the violent, tread on by the powerful, pushed this way and that by the shifting tectonic plates, our footholds are tenuous at best. We find a temporary reprieve in accomplishments, or by dropping out or managing everyday crisis or joining the ranks of false activism.

And I find this freedom to be an imposter, a sham, forcing us to wear mask figuratively and literally. To both hide and cry out, to be fearful and rebellious. To straddle the lines of sanity and depravity. We are free to be alone –on a cold and barren shore.

But…we are free.

Aren’t we?

Author:

nurse, mother, artist, and chameleon ...

14 thoughts on “But we are FREE…Aren’t we?

  1. I agree in that I’ve just decided to just do what’s right for me and my family. Teach my girls how we persevere on dispute such madness/sadness. Do good things for those who need it around us. Our impact may look small, but to those we helped, the world. And you’re right there’s nobody to turn to for any help, everyone is going through a lot currently. I like your thought on just keep doing your thing! This world needs more good people like you!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. i applaud you for such. i taught my kids the same and mostly they adhere to that..charity and generosity of spirit. however, as of late, i see changes eve in them with all the brainwashing and rhetoric in their face everyday ..it saddens me..this is not how i raised them. I can only take solace in the fact that i continue to try to set an example of diversity and discernment in these matters…hugs!!

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  2. This picture and post does so capture the moment, Lovie. I’m not naive enough to realize that we do have corruption in our systems, but for a major part of our population to believe this misinformation spewed out by Chump just leaves me numb and questioning everything. This comes from a guy who voted Republican for 16 years until he came into the scene. I preach more Love, but honestly just don’t know how we can ever get this country back to some type of common beliefs. Writing this makes me think this has all been stirring long before Asshole came on the scene. …wow I really jumped into it this morning..big hugs to you my friend. I’ll end on a quote that I always think about during insane times. “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of the human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.”
    ― Viktor E. Frankl

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    1. thanks Dwight. it’s touch not to say anything, even for us stoic types. i do my best but sometimes the barriers of my mind are breached and i become Mouthus Vomitus..lol..big hugs to you also..and advance apologies for any further indulgences of my inner workings going forward….

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  3. The brainwashed drones who are family members are the worst. I can’t even watch the news. The division in this country fueled by the distorted “stories” we are fed is, I’m afraid, irreparable. It does force us to go inside an just concern ourselves with our own little worlds, which I know isn’t the answer. Hugs and hang on.💕

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  4. How eloquently said! I love your beautiful art. Well, what can I say, I had to tune out the news a bit, personally! I check NPR maybe once per day. But not first thing in the morning. I do my mediation and devotion before letting any of that stuff into my consciousness. Even Plato’s “Allegory of the Cave” suggested the people were stuck in place, watching the shadows on the wall, thinking it was reality. A lot of the politics feels like that- a manipulation. And people feed on it. So, personally, I’m stepping back and out and tuning into joy, inner peace, and quiet moments as much as I can. It’s helping. Big hugs 💜

    Liked by 2 people

    1. yup. My roommate just deactivated from Fb and she listens to NPR also.Unfortunately i can’t tolerate any radio anymore, but i used to listen to it. I find my news on here believe it or not..and find it to be more realistic than anywhere else…but lately i have been having trouble meditating even with my usual binaural tones. I believe it’s just lack of sleep and stress-i am always in survival mode with nightshift..But it can’t go on forever and i fight it with everything i have! Namaste!

      Liked by 1 person

  5. I thought it was just the US and kind of longed to be somewhere else, yesterday I found out in Japan the right wing and left wing violently clash as well, they fight over if the emperor is really the direct descendant of the sun Goddess (for the emperor is not only political but the founder of the Shinto religion that 99% of the country subscribes to) and the left wing thinks having a puppet emperor is unnecessary and smothers democracy. I don’t know if it makes it better or worse to know the craziness is larger than we even thought? But for me it made me feel better to know our politics are doing what they do more than going wrong, the system is working more or less as it is able, if we make something different perhaps it will be different, but what we have made does what it is more or less able and intended to do (it seems to me). “In that direction,” the Cat said, waving its right paw round, “lives a Hatter: and in that direction,” waving the other paw, “lives a March Hare. Visit either you like: they’re both mad.” “But I don’t want to go among mad people,” Alice remarked. “Oh, you ca’n’t help that,” said the Cat: “we’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.” “How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice. “You must be,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.” ☕

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  6. Your place is a position of sense, intellect and reason. That’s what matters. It’s an absolute mess all over the world right now. The spotlight is on your country, but we are not any better. Right now, in the midst of so many people dying and falling ill and the mental health problems that will surely now escalate exponentially… we need more than ever to do our best for ourselves and our loved ones. Be true, be kind and be fully educated in what is truth and what is lies and corruption. It’s all you have control over right now. Sending hugs 🤗

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