There used to be a TV show by that name. I remember watching it as a child. It was what the media projected as the perfect example of a happy, carefree woman of the world at that time. Today, ideals are a bit different but the ‘theme’ is the same.
We all know the type. We see her in movies, on the street, at work, and in our minds. She is a neighbor, a celebrity, a character in a novel, our colleague. She is everywhere, and we can’t help but notice.
She’s the girl we want to be- somewhere deep in our mind. The woman we secretly try to emulate, or at least admire- not that we want anyone to know. And she’s also the one we kind of hate because we feel like we will never measure up to.
For me, it has always been that chick with the perfect pony tail- a water bottle in one hand, a sturdy backpack, and a lean muscular body. She has mastered Yoga, works out faithfully and has superhuman energy 20 hours a day, every day. She is the girl who has the most unique skills imaginable, the most useful yet obscure knowledge and knows how to make money doing exactly what she loves.She travels the world doing cool stuff. She’s gets up everyday, does all the right things and is out the door before the sun rises. She hops into her sporty, yet practical, vehicle wearing the perfect outfit, fully fueled with a nutritious breakfast. She is prepared for anything, and she is successful at all she does. Her time is structured, disciplined and organized. She has solid plans for a future- including retirement. She is beautiful to look at, and awesome to hang out with.
Ugh. Did you get a little nauseaous just reading that? I did.
Never the less-in my head- that’s who i want to be.
Sigh…. i never get up at dawn..i get into bed at 8am. I skip gym days sometimes and eat junk food because i feel overwhelmed. I love trivial pursuit but mostly suck at it.I love my job but it’s not my passion.I am successful at any given thing only about 50% of the time. I have almost zero solid plans for my retirement. Oh, and i really hate trying to get a perfect pony tail- that’s a myth!
Try as we might, we will never be her – she doesn’t exist. Even if she did, our mind would add on ever more ideals for her to live up to.
And yet, to others – you are probably her without even realizing it!
Think about those times when you notice someone suddenly wearing a hairstyle eerily similar to your own. Or those times you notice a friend trying a new hobby closely related to yours. Maybe there’s a neighbor who starts growing a garden that starts suspiciously looking like yours. I have noticed it from time to time in fellow artists who step out of their usual medium and attempt to emulate my own style in one way or another. It used to bother me, but i’ve learned to feel honored. There’s always someone out there who admires or envies YOU.
Remember-all of your heroes have heroes as well. And heroes are a good thing-they inspire us to be better. They push us towards our goals and help us see a better version of ourselves. They force us to look in the mirror and face what we don’t like, and advance towards what we want. So, no worries-You don’t have to give her up
To someone out there, YOU are “that girl”.
Embrace her. But take care to love the one in the mirror even more.